Thursday, December 06, 2007

the unsinkable Janita Waltonski

She has done it again!

Against all odds, diagnosis, prognosis, prescriptions, therapies and experiments, she has decided that the best definition of health is her own and the best path is what she decides is best for herself. No suprise here for those with a long acquaintance with Jan. She just found herself beyond the end of the rope when one the same answer from the medical establishment came back one too many times: we don't know what causes such strong reactions to the drug therapy. You need to continue trying new drugs until we find one that will work with you. Easier to say than to do. She was on the 11th tryout, with the same results: drowsiness, difficulty finding words, pain in right side, difficulty understanding, difficulty hearing, reduced vision... if she continued this path, soon she would be like Helen Keller...looking for a miracle worker.

So here she was tonight, bringht and alert, with an unusual energy level, with great clarity in her words, and minimal difficulty finding words, all due to the fact that she decided not to take her pill today. It is a difficult choice: increased risk of seizures or dramatically decreased quality of life.

We went to the last class of a course we have been taking for 10 weeks. Sometimes she attended but had to lie down in one of the couches because of extreme fatigue, also, she could not participate much because she could not find the words... so she would come home frustrated and sad for the losses... she would say that she would rather die if this is the type of life awaiting her under these medications. Tonight she was awake, alert, talkative and walking on water... so to speak.

We don't know where this road is going to take us, we both embrace risks. Tonight we prayed that her brain would be protected from seizures w/o the drugs. It is a journey with no map, but with a strong sense that God is walking right next to us all the way, and that the tender hands of those who love us will be holding ours.


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