Thursday, July 05, 2007

How Jan is overcoming her aneurysm

Jan had an aneurysm on February, 2006. The first prognosis was not good, but as time went by, a more optimistic picture emerged. Two lessons came from the many meetings with doctors and friends: first, no one knows how the brain really works or how it heals; second, that the healing is as unique as each individual is, that a big factor in the healing lays within the individual, in the determination to get well.

The following reflects these lessons.

Jan cannot find the words
-She can’t find them in her mouth-.
Jan is a painter without a canvas,
a musician without an instrument.
Jan can see the words
-she has them in her head-;
like a palette of a thousand colours,
endless scores of songs,
words to shape visions,
words to build belief
but Jan cannot find them now,
she is in a brawl with aphasia.

Jan’s world was born of words:
a universe painted with words
chiselled out of adjectives and nouns,
her life is a watercolour of verbs,
Jan was born a wordsmith
her purpose was to talk life,
to make words of truth
to make words of beauty
to make words of goodness.
Nowadays, life is at a standstill,
aphasia withholds her words.

In the most fundamental sense
Jan is a poet, Jan is a maker.
With broken words
She makes God present
She makes life urgent
She makes music essential
Jan is remaking her tools
the tools aphasia shattered
Jan will write new poems
Jan will paint new paintings
Jan will sing new songs
because her faith in God
and her love for words
are bigger than aphasia.


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