There is no perfect drug just perfect life sentences

The seizure Jan had on Sunday shaked her determination to be off drugs. Two days later, she is getting back to her old self and convictions.

What does Jan do when she feels strongly about something?

Aunt Mary once told me a story when Jan was 16. The family was portaging in Algonquin Park, all with heavy loads on their backs. They were getting to the point when fatigue is greater than the desire to get to the destination, but every one kept walking.

Aunt Mary turned and saw Jan coming down the path, carrying her heavy back pack. She was so tired that she was crying.

Aunt Mary offered her help, to which Jan replied: "I will get there by myself, even if I have to cry all the way"....

That's what she does.

There are many people out there believing that there is a perfect drug that will control their ailments for ever. Jan thinks otherwise, particularly after trying 11 different drugs to control seizures only to find that each had so many negative side effects that the option was a matter of degree but the net result was to go through life dopped out. Many people take the diagnosis of the limited medical knowledge of their physicians with the faith of a convert, and accept the life senteces they issue to take drugs for the rest of their lives. Physicians do not assume responsibility for the broken promises of the drugs. They pass the blame to the manufacturers. In the mean time people go through life chained to questionable prescriptions.

Jan questions everything, including her husband and even her religion.

So, in spite of a new seizure, I suspect she will take responsibility for the risk of staying out of medications. Instead she will be determined enough to go to bed early, to keep strong emotions under control, to keep sounds moderate, to keep lights dimmed and to continue the way to recovery, even if she has to cry all the way...


FC