Thursday, June 08, 2006

Wednesday Blog

Dear Jan,

Being back at Bridgepoint this morning was a strange experience for me. Perhaps it was a reminder of what the hospitals are: places in which people in various degrees of brokenness are put together to the best knowledge and tools available to the staff. I became acutely aware of the profound brokenness in which you were when you arrived here; I also realized how much you had advanced in your rehabilitation since then. The feeling was bitter-sweet. I was struggling to mix in the same thought memories of gratefulness and pain.

I saw that you were more at ease coming back. For you it seemed to be a trip back to a place that has come to symbolize so much for you: routines and the certainty of support upon request, rehabilitation programs and the endless variety of faces and interactions that satisfied your curious nature. We passed in the hallways a coupe of therapists and nurses and all greeted you with so much happiness. Obviously you made a mark on them, but then again, I know now how you can impact people deeply everywhere you go. I am amazed at the depth of your impact on my own life in the brief time we had together before the aneurysm. Perhaps it is that you have found a way to love people fearlessly, and that can only invite reciprocity.

You had sessions of speech therapy and physio. Then we went house-hunting in the west. We ended up at your brother's home. We talked and planed and ate and drank some of his nice wine (well, you didn't) and for a moment this seemed normal life.

We got home late, way passed your bed time. You were gracious and peaceful. I was happy to be back home, my familiar territory. You told me you were happy wherever I was and I felt blessed.


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