Thursday, March 23, 2006

Frustration

One antonym of patience is frustration. We know that this can be a common feeling for Jan these days. She struggles with the right hand that refuses to be found in her brain [aaawh, tch!], as well as that right leg that has less power than the right. [oooh, man!], the room was too hot, then too cold [the injustice!]. her hospital gown kept getting tangled around her neck (how dare they!], she hit her knee on the bed railings [no consideration!] and on top of all that, her husband just could not understand her needs tonight [utterly unconstitutional!]. I hope you didn't think that I was speaking about Jan, because, it was I who was experiencing an extra load of frustration.

Jan was more tired and irritable. But that is expected in her condition. Tonight, I felt like the patient, and I don't really have any excuse. [I hope you will forgive me Jan, for loosing sight of your pain].

I am glad to hear that Jan had a good visit with Louise and Mom, than David and another friend dropped by. I am really encouraged when I hear that portions of her day and other visits are reasonably good.

Of course, my visit today had also plenty of good. Like for example, talking with the team this morning about the possibility of getting a weekend pass for Jan. Yes! She may be coming home for the weekend. There are some concerns about negotiating stairs and other safety and logistical challenges. But, there seemed to be a consensus about Jan being "ready" for this type of expedition. The word is that this type of visit will be helpful to Jan in her recovery of memory and will encourage her to strengthen her determination to get well.

Everyone has to agree on this, including the doctor, but it looks like it could happen.

So, in spite of Jan warning me in our first date that people said she wears her feelings and thoughts on her sleeve, we both decided to give it a try. She is nervous. It's too early to tell how I feel.

Pray for a happy visit home.

-Fede

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